Exciting Cross Country
Patiently we waited. Excitement down my chest. We were just sitting
there watching other people race. I couldn't wait until we raced.
It was the year 6 girls race. I started getting an enormous smile
on my face.
Finally it was our turn. We did some stretches I could feel it in my
thigh.
I was excited and anxious at the same time. The whistle went.
I ran at a good comfortable pace. The teachers started cheering us on.
I got more confident. Kids started giving me high fives i quickly became
happy with a huge smile on my face.
I was proud of myself because I had not stopped to walk yet. I felt something
cut my legs but I did not stop to look. I felt happy because I was on my 3rd
and final lap. I started to sprint to the finish line Mr Barclay and Mr House
gave me a high five. I happily finished the race.
I looked at my legs and I had 11 little cuts on one leg and 3 on the other.
I put some water on them and that made them even worse. My legs started
to sting a lot because of the water. My friend was still coming so I went to
cheer him on. “Go Luke!” I said. He gave me the thumbs up and looked at me
with a big smile on his face.
This week our classroom had to write about the cross country race or cross country practise because a lot of people were not here.
What I enjoyed was writing about this topic.
What I found challenging was making the writing interesting to read.
Hello, Larz.
ReplyDeleteMy name is Emerald, and I am a fellow student in your class.
Your writing style intrigues me. I like your descriptive language and your use of words. I think you could maybe work on (specifically) the second sentence. "Excitement down my chest", I would have more-so expected maybe "Excitement ran down my chest" per se. I learnt how others describe going through the cross country. Have you checked your punctuation?